In the past year, I haven’t been able to achieve very good sleep due to passing of my mother, however, when I do sleep, I have had many reoccurring dreams about meeting with my mother. The setting is always the same: I go to her house and she is waiting there for me and we take off in my car. I really can’t tell you where we are going there is no set destination but I am taking her to various stores and places she would enjoy but somehow as the day winds down, I feel the anxiousness rise inside me because I know she is gone so how can she be gone but with me still? So each time towards the end of the dream, I try my best to get her to stay with me, as if not to let her out of my sight thinking that will change things.
But somehow each time, when I look away from her and look back she is gone and then I begin to cry hysterically. I think I have this dream because of the sudden way my mother passed away, she was 44 and she passed away in her sleep. In relation to theories, this dream can be related to Rosalind Cartwright’s ideals that «dreams are a way of working through life’s problems». Even today, I still try and think what if anything could I have done to keep her with me even a second longer which is why I think I still have this dream. Dealing with this issue and time I believe will improve my sleep and help me not to have these dreams whereas now 1 — years later, I still have this dream at least once/twice month.
With the help of modern technology, scientists are able to determine which stage of sleep someone is in by measuring the signal their brain emits while sleeping at that given time. Typically, the first four levels of sleep are referred to as Non- Rapid Eye Movement (NREM) stages where in each stage increasing from 1 to 4 we able to sink deeper and deeper into sleep which makes waking very difficult. Then there is the Rapid eye movement stage in which rapid eye movements occur, dreams, high brain activity, and muscle paralysis are common characteristics. On a typical nights sleep, I am thinking about my boyfriend who is currently stationed in Iraq and the things I need to accomplish at work the next day.
So I would say when I am stage one of sleep I am probably drifting in and out of consciousness which can last for 5-20 minutes. In stage 2, I am completely asleep but can still be awoken pretty easily by loud noises or distractions. It is said that most human beings spend at least fifty percent of their sleep in this stage. After a few hours once I am sleeping, I begin my drift into stages three and four of sleep in which I am harder to awaken and will seem less rested if awoken during these stages. Then there is the fifth stage of sleep where Rapid Eye Movement occurs and makes your brain work the most during your sleep. The entire sleep cycle last only about 90 minutes and can occur about four to six times during a nights sleep.
In explaining multiple motives with examples from my life, I can relate my conflict of taking a dream vacation with my boyfriend when he comes back from Iraq or saving the money for our wedding as an approach-approach conflict. Although both outcomes are pleasant, here I am able to justify my upcoming wedding as being more desirable than our vacation therefore ending the conflict. When describing my desire to have children I am faced with an avoidance-avoidance conflict. I could get married and start and family or I would be horrible parent. By choosing to get my tubes tied, I am eliminating that conflict therefore resolving it.
Then there are the times when I could get all of my work done for the following day but I would have to stay 4 hours later than I normally would. This type of problem in normally referred to as approach-avoidance where until I can decide which one is more favorable to me I will be able to resolve this conflict. My dilemma with dating and choosing the right partner would fall into the most common type of multiple motives the multiple-approach conflict where I would have to got back to the same type of reasoning used in the approach-avoidance conflict to solve my problem.
I can remember how I felt when I found out that my boyfriend was going to be deployed to Iraq for a year, I felt a lot of anger and sadness. In relations to the James-Lange theory, which theorized that physiological change occurs prior to emotion, it could be said that I felt sad because I cried and anger because I started to throw things, I was really upset not at him, but at the situation he was put in. But if I was to view my emotions in the Cannon-Bard theory, which theorizes that emotions and the physical response happen at the same time, then my deep sadness that made me cry would be into context.
It is said that emotions vary by culture, in which each culture may use different or similar words to describe the same thing but one thing that all cultures do seem to have in common is that people tend to smile when they are happy and frown when they are sad. Body language can be seen as the universal language that unites us all and helps us understand each other also.